The most difficult part of self reflection is coming face to face with the truth because, the truth is often messy.
So you choose the illusive comfort of distraction instead; social media, “self care” dates, shopping sprees, finding faults in others, passing blame, working, bingeing on shows, food and more.
And since distractions are fleeting, you get caught in an exhausting chase — one, then another, and another..
But you see, the thing about avoiding introspection, is that you hinder yourself from growth and transformation.
Ask them, all those who have grown and transformed into their best-selves have done so by digging deep, facing the mess then doing something about the mess.
There’s no quick fix. No instant hacks to transformation. If you keep skipping the part where you address the mess, the journey will continue to feel like being caught in a hamster’s wheel.
You will keep taking one step forward and five steps back.
Allaah tells us in the Qur’aan that it is those who purify themselves, who tidy up their mess, that are successful.
قَدْ اَفْلَحَ مَنْ تَزَكّٰىۙ
Successful indeed are those who purify themselves,
And this is one of those things that is easier said than done because it takes courage.
It takes courage to get comfortable with the messiness of what lies beneath; beneath our behaviors; our self-sabotaging habits; our rebellion, our people-pleasing; our resentment; our choices.
And courage, courage is not built by chasing distractions and changing masks.
Courage is built by confronting the mess.
When you sit long enough with the mess, you will find enough courage to tidy it up.
And Allaah is the One whose Aid is sought.
TWO FREE RESOURCES
We had a session last week and I designed two assessment sheets to help the ladies dig deep, they are free, you can get them here.
If you do get the sheets (and use them), then brace yourself for the uncomfortable confrontation.
And then, remind yourself of the sweetness of the reward.
And when you’re ready to address your mess, you could start with this and this.
I hope you find the courage to dig deep, get comfortable and sit with your mess, as often as you need.
May Allaah assist us in doing the work to purify ourselves.
Your sister in striving,
Fatimah
On the road to Ihsan.
Subhanallah! Thank you for this 💕
😭🙌